Enter the Matrix

Remember when The Matrix was cool? When Keanu Reeves had some semblance of acting ability?

Me either.

The Matrix was scarily real for any computer user. You had Neo and Trinity and all them, the good people, who obviously lived by downloading stuff, and the evil people representing the RIAA/MPAA.

Or not. The whole movie was acclaimed as "Like real hackers!" except last time I looked, Hackers didnt jump in the air and float. It might have just been me. Overall, though, its not denyable that the Matrix was a smash hit when it came out, no matter HOW much the other two movies blew.

Anyway, just like how we know the sun will rise tomorrow, everyone knew good and well that there was going to be an Matrix game. The movie itself was MADE for gaming- I mean, cmon- people in trenchcoats vs. people in sunglasses? I see video game.

Anyway, to the actual game. The game itself feels outstandingly like a sucky Max Payne, as the 3rd person shooter mechanic just screams for the Max Payne flair. Of course, JUST LIKE MAX PAYNE, there's bullet time, as well as a myraid assortment of weapons.



Okay, complaint number one. This game is WAY TOO EASY. At any point in the game, if you run out of guns to use, your fighting mechanic will suffice to pummel everything in sight. And hell, if you don't want to do that, you can run. It doesnt matter: You're Neo! I mean no, you're not, you're some secondary s***ty character from the 2nd movie which no-one would have noticed except for the fact that they're from this game. And don't even get me started on Will Smith's wife- overall, the game is unbalanced.

Second complaint. The game doesnt feel cool. When I got this game, I was expecting to load up this game and feel like I'm Neo, and just wreck awesome slo-mo havoc on everyone in your path. Of course, this is anything far from the truth: You go around (Like Max Payne) shooting and running, not jumping and doing fun flips. Sure, you CAN do fun flips, but whats the use of doing those things when you kill things more efficiently by just going up to them point blank and unloading on them.



Third complaint. Bullet Time is useless, like I stated above. While this could be considered part of my second complaint, I think it just needs to be re-stated. With all the god d*** bullet time in the Matrix movies, you'd think that the developers would give more focus on the Bullet Time. All that news about the game team spending constant months on the moves is BS- the moves are repetitive, stupid, and never change. Run up on a wall and hit bullet time, your character runs up it. Thats it.

Fourth complaint. The driving mechanic sucks. When you're driving around in your whatever-the-WB-was-plugging-in-the-second-movie, you basically move like a fast crappy tank. For all that attention the Driving mechanic was getting, it just didnt do a d***ed thing for me.



Fifth complaint(s). I'll just list out more things that grinded on my nerves:
- The graphics on the XBOX version such because of the HDTV support
- It sometimes lagged even on the console version
- The weapons sucked, even double fisting them
- The levels were short, stupid, and easy
- The "Hacking" ability is a useless tack on
- Some of the enemies make no sense, like the Vampires

Got it yet? The game blows major ass. From ALL THAT attention the game got, the game ended up blowing harder than a $5 whore. Whats even greater, during this game, you're assaulted by advertisements like for Intel, Powerade, and that one car I mentioned.

The game has no redeeming qualities except for the fact that its like Max Payne, which is unoriginal. If it werent for the fact that I didnt pay much for this game, I'd give it a mushroom. However, I'll be kind today and give it 1 star. However, don't pick up this game, no matter what console: It blows ass, period.

1 star(s) out of 5

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