Rumble Roses

When I first heard there was a game that has only chicks wrestling each other. Tears of joy flew down me as I rushed out to buy the game. Only to find out this game is one of the worst games I've ever encountered. Rumble Roses has a all-female cast and each of them are connected to each other somehow. The gameplay somewhat blows and the moves are repetitive. I'll get into this later on.

The story is that a contest called "Rumble Roses" where all the females are either eager to win big money or meet someone that they came there to meet. As you progress through the extremely short story, you find out some characters are related to each other and such. The cast has ALOT of stereotypes. Like the latino Naughty nurse, the big breasted Texan girl, the random japanese girl with a knack for randomly talking to her dead mother, a girl dressed up in a devil suit, and many more casts. The voice acting makes me want to smack myself with a wooden bat. It is so horrible...not as bad as the first Resident Evil but pretty d*** bad. Alot of the voices are annoying like this singer's voice but she sounds like a cancer victim (No offense to the actual cancer victims) You can whip through the story and back in a matter of 10 minutes if you know the tactics *cough* constant submissions *cough* The story is o.k and very predictable.



This shouldn't be called a wrestling game at all. Each character has about 6 moves and it's normal to see 8 more characters with the exact same moves as one character. There are "Killer Moves" and "Lethal Moves" but they are boring after you see them for the 6-8 times. There are about 10 characters and they each have alter-egos which you unlock after beating the game but I must say. Why didn't they create atleast 5 more different characters instead of these stupid alter-egos. The alter-egos have their own story but it's basically 1) Short Dialogue 2)5 fights in a row 3) More dialogue and end of story.
This game doesn't have much features. It would've been perfect if they added CAW (Create-A-Warrior) Lets get to the part of the game which I could I could get excited over: MUD WRESTLING. Mud Wrestling is horrible. The mud look like brown lube mixed alot of water. It doesn't look like mud. There is some replayability considering if you're one of those people who need to unlock everything so they can be satisfied. Gameplay is weaker then a cancer victim (No offense cancer victims)



Please stab my ears until they stop working.. The soundtrack is pretty big because it includes a entrance theme for every girl and a basic theme for every girl. It just gets so d*** annoying if you despise one theme then suddenly it plays and you get really really pissed. The soundtrack is made out of various tunes from Techno to Rock. Wait...WHAT?! Techno and rock coming together in a game? impossible. It doesn't mix well and I really don't like songs where some random lady is screaming "BASHING THE PORT" or something along those lines.



Visuals are stunning and really nice and cutscenes are well done.The girls look hot for pixels and they have...well boring face expressions like "Smile" and "Frown" and "Angry face until you get smacked by a crazed cyborg" The problem is that the visuals won't save this nearly bad game. The gallery mode is fun for prank calls because you get to control lines they say in the story and that my friends comes in handy when you're prank calling some pizza parlor.

Sorry Rumble roses but you could've been a better game and I'm disapointed in you Konami. Maker of great games such as my god Metal Gear and other great titles such as DDR. I can't believe you created such a craptastic game. Thank god Hideo Kojima didn't help create this or else I would've lost faith in him. This game gets only one star for being so bad.

All-female wrestling game is a good concept, they just need better developers working on it. I pray there's no sequel because the ending makes me worry.

1 star(s) out of 5

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