I'm beginning to hate the XBOX 360

3. The XBOX 360 has Gamer Tags, which essentially is like virtual gamer penis size.



When was the last time you wanted to brag to your buddy about your speed in any given game, but didnt have that oomph of your XBOX monitoring your stuff like I monitor the breast sizes of celebrities? Well, the XBOX 360 is going to monitor your game prowess. So for me, the card would be something like this:

Halo 2- Sux
Halo- Sux
JSRF- ROCKS TEH BIG ONE
DDR- ROX TEH BIG ONE
Spongebob Squarepants(I don't actually have this game)- "I am a fag for even owning this game".

Why the hell do I want some loser looking through how fast I got through Need for Speed Underground? Seriously. Grow up, people.

4. It sucks compared to the PS3

In any comparison- hardware speed, digital video quality, game licences, even how much on each CD, the PS3 has trumped the XBOX 360. Like I read on one gaming site, "It was awesome seeing the XBOX 360. Then we saw the PS3 and forgot all about the 360. Screw it.". Let's face it: The 360 looked rushed. They didn't have the games on the literal system, all they had was fake systems in little windows for you to oooh and ahhh at when you really were playing Apples.

Now, let's look at the PS3. While there were no playable demos (I'd prefer no playables to FAKE playables), they had videos generated with the REAL PS3 hardware. Sure, the system was shown on the floor, and it probably had nothing in the case. Sure, the controller needs work, and they are working on it. But let's face it, it's a lot better than having fancy Apple G5 stands with a shitty Twisted Metal ripoff running.

5. For all this, it ditched the XBOX

Guess what, kiddos? In all that, Microsoft ditched the XBOX like I ditch a girl once I find out she's married with three kids at 16. The ONLY game given time on the show floor for the XBOX was the new Conker game, which, personally, I hate the Conker games. So guess what? All you XBOX owners can, according to Microsoft, go suck it. I suppose you'll have to shell out more cash for the 360 only to find out IT blows.



Overall, sure, I slammed the 360 like a maniac. It deserves it. I felt like the XBOX 360 has turned out to be the rushed, chintzy, cheap looking piece of trash that the Dreamcast looked to me when IT came out. And I was right about the Dreamcast. And I'm probably gonna be right about this. Suck it, Microsoft.

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